Are we allowed to hang out? The Enemy is LOVING THIS.

This is grievous. I keep hearing that people are telling people not to hang out with people because they don’t go to Harvest anymore. That is the work of the Enemy. And then there are other people saying don't hang out with these other people because they DO go to Harvest, and that is also the Enemy. Why do you think the Lord said don’t be all like “I follow Paul, I follow Apollos”, or "I follow James MacDonald or I follow this other guy, or I go here or I go there?" 

³ You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere humans? ⁴ For when one says, “I follow Paul,” and another, “I follow Apollos,” are you not mere human beings? 1Cor 3:3-5

It is exactly the kind of thing that causes division among the brethren. And what does the Lord care about for His children? The same thing we care about with ours: peace, unity, love. 

 ³ Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. ⁴ There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called  Eph 4:2-4.  

There is one body. Not a bunch of little, autonomous bodies running around- we are to be one. That is how the world will know that we are His own and want some of what we've got. If we are a divided people, a divided house, we are not fulfilling the command that God has placed before us: to LOVE ONE ANOTHER. No matter where I am, or where I go to church, I'm not going to let anyone tell me that I should not hang out with someone because they don’t go to the same church that I go to. Those are the Enemy's tactics, the Liar's plan- to divide the body. If you have a problem with the leadership at some other guy's church, fine, you don't have to ignore that. Hold your opinion, you're entitled to it. But you do not have to cut yourself off from all of your brothers and sisters who do go to that church who don't have a problem with the leadership there. And I would hope and pray that the reverse is also true.

 I love the people who go to my church, and I love the people who go to your church, and I love the people who go to that dude's church over there... why do I love them? Because they all are my brothers and sisters. If you don't want to be my brother that's up to you. If you decide that you don’t want to be my sister because I don't go to James MacDonald's church, that's up to you, but if someone tells me I shouldn't hang out with you because you go to Harvest, I'm going to tell the devil to get on out of my way. As for me and my house, we are going to love you in the Lord because we are His. Dang, people, don't let that lying, conniving, evil one tear us apart. We are to be unified, in harmony, like a song.  

Live in harmony with one another. Rom 12:16. 

But I am saddened in my heart, because there's one group of people over there singing their separate song, and the other group over there singing their separate song, and I'm not hearing many harmonies.

Genesis: Chapter 17... I dub thee.

When Abram was 99 years old, the Lord appeared to Abram and said to him, “I am Almighty God; walk before me and be blameless. (17:1)

In this chapter the Lord re-names Abram and Sarai. They are now Abraham and Sarah and the Lord loads them with more promises about how kings of peoples shall be from them and all that. There's only one problem- they aren't even pregnant. God changes their names and calls them who they are before they are who He says they will be (i.e. Peter and Paul). God is constantly changing people's names BEFORE they become who God intends for them to be.

He does it with us, too. God changes us way deep on the darkest inside BEFORE He makes happen what we so desperately want to happen.. I have no idea why God made Abraham and Sarah wait so long (24 years up to this point)) to fulfill His promise to them. But I figure if you're going to be the parents of many nations and kings are going to come from you- you're character better be pretty well formed. We might think we are completely ready for something in our life, but in reality we need 4/ 8/ 16 more years to age/ change/ transform... be molded/ sanctified/ purified. I mean when God works something out every little thing has to be in place, right? If a person is setting up an intricate and delicate row of dominoes, you can't hit the first domino without it starting a chain reaction of falling stones.What if one of those stones isn't set up yet? Then the rest of the stones behind it won't fall. I imagine that if we're waiting for something... God has to set up all these stones... then He hits the first domino. I always want to hit that thing way before the rest of the stones are ready.

That's all I'm saying. That lots of times God changes us first, then makes stuff happen. I'm super-glad it's not always the other way around. In my impatience for whatever it is, I am not always ready for what I think I need/ want /deserve even though I want that thing really bad right now. But God has a different time-line. He needs to see me a little bit different first. Okay, Sir, sculpt away.

genesis: chapter 16... drain the pool

Now Sarai, Abram's wife, had borne him no children. (16:1)

So she takes matters into her own hands and tells her husband to have sex with her servant and the child would be hers and that's how the promise would be fulfilled?

It's so easy for me to judge Sarai. How could she do such a stupid thing? Didn't she believe God's promise? But that woman had waited for years- into old age- longing for a child. God's promise was like a carrot at the end of a mile-long stick. Did Sarai care that Abram would be the father of nations? I'm pretty sure she just wanted a baby. I hear there's no longing like the unfulfilled longing of wanting to be a mom. I'm not even going to pretend I know what that feels like. These days there are different ways of getting around infertility (none of which I am morally commenting on by the way). Back then you had sex with your wife's servant.

Have I ever wanted something so much that I would do anything to make it happen? Even though my meddling would result in a bastardized version of what God really wanted for me? Lately, I've been realizing that all of the discontent I carry about my life flows from one stagnant pool of unrealized entitlement. As in, "I deserve that but am not getting it" and especially, "I deserve that because I've waited so long for it." Did Sarai think she deserved a baby right away because she had waited for one for so long?

There is no formula that says that the longer I wait for something the more I deserve it. In reality, I not only deserve nothing, I deserve less than nothing. And even as I write this I sickly congratulate myself on the disclosure of this humble discovery -NOW I actually DO deserve everything I've waited for. What a joke. It's still not true. I don't. The only person who says I do is me, and because of that I walk around believing that what I have before me isn't good enough. I am living in the future, not embracing the present. I am pushing away the bountiful plate of food set before me, whining because I want something better to eat.

From now on, by God's grace alone, I refuse to expect any more than I have been given, and I refuse to apologize for what I don't have to whoever might judge me for it. I refuse to take matters into my own hands and bear something that's not meant for me.  I will, by the power of God, exercise patience and wait- cultivating gratitude and murdering entitlement. I want only to receive from the Lord without my hand-print on any part of it. I mean, who gets the credit for that mess? Me. Who gets the credit for the real thing? God. It's so much more soul-filling to give credit where it's due, when it's due- to God alone.

genesis: chapter 15... something from nothing

After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying "Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward." (15:1)

I wonder what Abram was worried about. He just conquered a bunch of armies what could he be afraid of?

Was he feeling a bit sick in his stomache? Uneasy like something was wrong but he couldn't put his finger on it? I'll tell you what next time I've got goosechills and butterflies I'm chanting this verse into my heart: "I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward." Amen.

God is telling Abram not to worry- He's got it covered and smothered. Abram questions Him back about the logistics of God's promise to make Him the father of countless when the only kid in his life is a servant's child born in his house. Abram is old, Sarai is old, the promise is old. But God re-affirms it by taking Abram outside and making him look up- showing him the stars.

Roman 4:17b says (referring directly to Abram's promise): God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did... and then Abram in verse 18: contrary to hope, in hope believed.

There was nothing in Abram's sight to make him even start to believe the crazy, outer limits promise that God had bestowed upon him. But against all hope he believed. So I decided that I'm going to believe, too. Not just for the little things that I usually pray for, but for the big, crazy stuff for me and my kids and my man and my family. I am praying this verse back to God that He will call into existence things that do not exist. He's done it before. He did it when He created the universe and the earth and the people in it. He did it when he called me from death to life. He did it when He fulfilled His promise to Abram. That's what He does, makes things that weren't there, there. I know what I am praying for and it's pretty radical. But not unthinkable, especially when you look up and see what Abram saw in the sky.

genesis: chapter 14... what's in it for me?

And it came to pass... that they made war... (14:1-2)

Abram went to rescue his captured nephew, using his own resources, his own men, at risk of his own life. He was more than victorious, of course. Four things I love about Abram in this story: 1) He was a shrewd master who trained his servants not only to serve him, but to be an army. 2) He was a tactical military commander- by dividing his forces and attacking by night he outwitted the armies of 4 kings. 3) After his victory, he humbly allowed the King/Priest of Salem (Melchizedek) to bless him while blessing God Most High, and gave the Priest a tithe of the goods he had retrieved, showing that he honored God in his victory. 4) He refused to accept a gift of the rest of the goods from the King  of Sodom (which I suspect were rightfully his anyway since he was the commander who retrieved them).

Would I have kept the spoils of war? Would I have accepted compensation for my trouble? When I help a friend in any way, am I hoping (even just a little bit) to be rewarded for my exertion? Am I expecting a thank you note at least, hopefully with a gift card tucked inside? Am I looking for a public display of gratitude maybe on a wall post? Would I accept a repayment in some form- babysitting? A meal? A well-timed decaf americano with soy dropped off in the middle of a dreary afternoon?

I don't want to be like that. I just want to be like Abram. I really don't think Abram was thinking about what he was going to gain from the situation while he was valiantly saving his nephew. I want to be already prepared to help, and more than ready to go at the sound of an alarm, using all of my resources without stopping to count the cost. I want to give glory to God when my help was successful and disaster is avoided, and refuse to accept payment in any form for my efforts. Not expecting, not anticipating, not awaiting, not even wanting anything in return. The only thing I want to expect, the only thing I want to accept, is blessing from the Lord.  

genesis: chapter 13... give it up

Then Abram went up from Egypt, he and his wife and all that he had, and Lot with him, to the South. (13:1)

The problem was Abram and Lot had too much stuff. So they had to separate. Nice problem to have. This is one of my favorite stories about this man, Abram: that he gave Lot the first choice in which way to go. Abram was Lot's Uncle, obviously blessed by God and a patriarch among men, but he was humble and faith-filled enough to allow Lot to make the first choice in what land he wanted. He could have said "Go South for 50 days and that is where you may dwell, for the Lord gave me this land" or "I will take this you take that" or "Go over there, fool".  But Abram trusted that no matter what land Lot chose, God's promise would prevail- He would still bless Abram and make him great nation.

Abram showed true generosity here. His magnanimous heart gave his God-given right and privilege over to someone else. That's pretty difficult for me to do if you want to know the truth. Sometimes, I admit, I can be a little bit selfish, a little bit greedy, a little bit of a hoarder. I hate it. I hate being that way because it does me no good at all. It just makes me small and guilty and alone with whatever I thought I couldn't live without. For years I've been trying, with supernatural power behind me, to give. Generously. Pressed down overflowing generosity. Whatever I have that someone might want, or time, or effort, I am learning to be a giver. Do you think when I do that I get what Lot got (living near exceeding wickedness?). No way. I get what the Lord gave Abram- blessing. Every time.

genesis: chapter 12... move it or lose it

Now the Lord said to Abram: 

"Get out of your country, 
From your family, 
And from your father's house, 
To a land that I will show you. 
I will make you a great nation; 
I will bless you
And make your name great; 
And you shall be a blessing, 
I will bless those who bless you, 
And I will curse him who curses you; 
And in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed."
(12:1)

Abram was 75 when the Lord made him pick up all his belongings and lumber to a new place he had never seen before. He grabbed his wife and his nephew and all the people of his household and caravaned to Canaan. Sounds so easy on paper. We read a few lines in black and white and Abram's whole life changes. Man, He must have had his ears wide open to be able to hear the Lord so clearly about this. His willingness to concede, to pack it all in, and to travel shows how completely he trusted that the Lord would do what He said He would do: bless Abram. Believing a promise like that, how could Abram resist?

It wasn't an easy journey, either. They were forced to slide over to Egypt because there was famine in the land they were traveling through. So they must have been hungry, or thirsty if the famine was due to drought. Then there was the whole sister/ wife Pharaoh thing. That can't have been easy for anyone (especially Sarai). But the Lord worked it all out and not only got those kids out of a tough spot, but he blessed them with bounty as a result of it. Nice.

Honestly, it's hard to move. It's hard to move to a new home, or a new job, or a new place, or a new church. It's hard. When the Lord calls me out, I want to hear His voice so clearly so I know I am doing the right thing- that He is the one doing the calling. I want so badly to trust Him not only at the beginning, but in the middle when it's hard and I'm discouraged and I have to make detours and stops and I'm feeling starved... and I want to trust Him at the end when it's all over.  I want to stop along the way to memorialize what He did and how good God is and how faithful, just like Abram did. I want to continually continually continually believe that He will bless my family for our obedience, for our faith, for our perseverance. For moving when He says to move. Move.

genesis: chapter 11... bad plan

Now the whole earth had one language and one speech. (11:1)

They were on God's plan. They were multiplying. They were filling the earth. They were getting it done. Then they happened upon this great place- this nice flat piece of land and decided they would stop and live there. Maybe they decided they had wandered far enough. Maybe one fearless leader had this killer idea and because he was so charismatic it caught on. They all pulled together and decided together to build a city and a tremendous tower.  They were doing it for what seemed to be a good cause- staying together, being famous ("let us make a name for ourselves - 11:4)"), creating a home-base. But really, that was the opposite of what they were supposed to be doing- filling the whole earth. They got seriously sidetracked. But they were building this huge thing, and they were doing it together, and they were doing it for a good cause and they had to work hard for it ("let us make bricks"- 11:3), so how could something so wrong feel so right?

It just was. There they were, easing on down the road to somewhere and before they knew what hit them, they were doing the complete opposite of what God had instructed them to do. I'm sure they were able to justify it to themselves- I mean the tower was so BIG, and they were making progress, and people were involved and excited about it, and the tower was so BIG- so how could they all be wrong?

In every choice I make, every minute of my little life, I could be doing what God wants me to do, or I could be doing something else. Have I ever been on God's plan and then been sidetracked?  Veered off and while it seemed like I was still building on His plan and making it better it was actually totally undermining whatever He wanted to accomplish? Have I followed a leader who was building something really big and it was too exciting to get off the train? Have I justified my actions and denied my God? Have you?

Either way, God will get it done, with or without my obedience. I would, though, rather be traveling to that end with His map in my hand instead of my own. Think of the frustration avoided. The victory claimed. The fulfillment enjoyed. Might as well get off the bad plan it was gonna be a bust all along.

genesis: chapter 10... oh, brother.

Now this is the genealogy of the sons of Noah: Shem, Ham, and Japheth. And sons were born to them after the flood. (10:1)

When I was a kid I liked my uncles a lot. A couple of them were on the Olympic cycling team in their day, one was into motorcycles, another lived in Key West, FL. They were just cool. One day I asked my mom how long it had been since we had seen one of them. It had been a year. I couldn't even fathom that. Not seeing your brother for a YEAR. How is that possible when they are so THERE all the time when you are a kid?

Could three brothers be any closer than Noah's sons? They spent a year on a boat together- I'm thinking there wasn't much to hide between them. But as usual, things got mucked up. Ham had his little peep-and-tell with Noah, and then they all had kids and their own separate lives. Did they see each other at weddings and funerals? Births and rite of passage ceremonies?  Family reunions?

It turns out that their kids all settled in what has become the hotspot of the world and have been killing each other ever since. Of course they are. They're family and families fight. Expectations aren't met and people get hurt and lash out and they fight. Cain and Able, Joseph and the lot of them, Shem, Ham, and Japheth. Siblings are always fighting. Jealousy and entitlement and annoyance. Then you grow up and realize one day that you actually have a choice as to whether you want to spend your time with a person or not, brother or no brother. In a burst of independence and defiance mixed with a bit of nostalgia, you exercise that choice. And a year goes by. Weird. 

I have no wisdom or insight about any of this. I just realize it's as old as the Bible, this issue with brothers and sisters. When my son can't even sleep he is so frustrated with his sister, or my daughter screams at her brother for the 6th time in an hour, it helps to realize it's been there all along and always will be as long as there are brothers on the earth. I try to help them through it. Come to a satisfactory resolution. I mean, I don't want them to be be at war or anything.

 

genesis: chapter 9... he's so wasted!

:
So God blessed Noah and his sons... (9:1)

And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brothers outside. (9:22)

Ham happened upon a drunken, passed out Noah and what did he do?  Did he cover his father's indignity? The man who saved his life and the life of his family? He did not. He sneered at him and went directly outside to tattle and maliciously damage his father's reputation. He felt the thrill of his father's sin, the electric shock of superiority we feel when we have a chance to put someone else down and lift ourselves up. That's exactly what it does, this sneering gossip. It falsely elevates us by putting another person down. Why are we as a race so ready to put ourselves forward, to judge the faults and iniquities of others? It's sickening, really.

Shem and Japheth are my heros in this story. I imagine them turning away from their brother, Ham, in concern over what he had just told them. I imagine them quietly conspiring about how to best walk in and how to hold the cape and how to cover him up so they won't have to at all look at Noah in his indignity. They cover him up with their faces turned away, never having to see his nakedness- showing the deepest respect for their father.

This is the kind of person I would like to be. Not the kind that sneers, not the kind that laughs, not the kind that thrills over a sister's sin. The kind that will do everything I can to cover her, to help her, to show compassion and respect even if what I do there might never come to light. Even if I might not ever receive acknowledgement or thanks or the same treatment in return. I have too often been the one who whispers and sneers and secretly thrills. I have too often been the one who needs forgiveness, let alone the one who needs covering up.

genesis: chapter 8... good choice

Then God remembered Noah... (8:1)

Noah's in the ark and all he can think about is how much longer? How much longer? How much longer? Why else would he be sending out ravens and doves all over the place every 7 days for as long as it took? He sent out the raven first- it being a bird that can survive on a broad range of food types, and then the dove, a much pickier eater. The raven kept coming back and forth, to and fro until the waters had dried up. Did Noah cry the first time the first time the dove returned? Did Noah monitor what the raven ate when she flew back to him? Did the raven increasingly eat less and less at home and the less she ate the more hopeful Noah became? When the dove failed to return, Noah knew the time was soon. Why didn't he get out then?

I love that he didn't get out. The Lord told him when to go in, and the Lord told him when to get out, and Noah wasn't going to move until he heard the word.

Genesis 7:1 “Come into the ark...”

Genesis 8:16 “Go out of the ark...”

So what were the birds for? Not much. Well what else was Noah going to do? Maybe he needed a little bit of hope. A little bit of of time to prepare. A little bit of news to go back and talk to his wife about. But really, it didn't matter whether he sent out those birds or not, God was still going to call Noah out of the ark when He decided to call him out... which wasn't until the earth was completely dry. The last torturous 2 months when the ground looked dry, but before the Lord had spoken...

The first thing Noah does after all that waiting and waiting and waiting? He worships God. He gives to God. He remembers God.

What a patient, obedient man. What a lover of the Lord. What a craftsman, what a hard worker, what a good husband/father/leader of his family. This is the man God chose to begin life again. Good choice.

genesis: chapter 7... waterlogged

Then the Lord said to Noah, "Come into the ark..." (7:1) 

According to people who study these things and like to add numbers together, Noah and family were on the boat just over a year all told. That is an incredibly long time to take a cruise to who knows where taking for who knows how long. I hope one of those wives brought along a deck of cards. Of course, Noah probably had a feeling it was going to take a while. I mean he was building that boat for years. Did Noah's mind need a year on the water in order to release the lost world? For Noah to travel from experiencing the death of everything he knew to establishing life (literally) in a new place? After being held safely captive for a year, Noah must have been overcome to simply see, stand, and touch dry earth again. Standing in the mountains of Ararat, the old world would have been a hazy memory to him after so long.

The more I ponder this absolutely monumental act of God, the more I see the wisdom in using flood waters to drown, decay, and ultimately wash away the filth that existed in population, round one. In fact, the flood was perfect. The perfect way to annihilate all the people on the earth save eight. How else could God have killed so many people without leaving a stinking graveyard lying around?

If a body is buried in a coffin deep in the ground, for example, it could take as long as 50 years for all of the tissue to disappear. But if it is exposed to the elements, it will decay very quickly. The most important factor in decomposition time is how much exposure the body has had to bacteria. Bacteria need oxygen to survive and are generally found in heavy concentrations in water. Therefore, exposure to air or water will speed up the process of decomposition dramatically. Animals and insects will feed on the tissue if a body is exposed, also quickening the process. http://curiosity.discovery.com/question/take-dead-body-to-decompose

Noah and his family had to stay on the boat that long because it took that long for the dead to die, be eaten by marine life and bacteria, and quickly decompose. They didn't have to deal with the bodies of the dead, or the stench, or even the burial, since the receding of the waters would have washed most everything away like the drain in a kitchen sink. It was perfect.

When I think about those people in the ark, and how they were forced to learn grief, and patience, and trust, and hard work, and inaction, and how they must have wanted so many times to scream, or cry, or jump over the side just to get off of there... you better believe that when I am in a similar situation- where I have to stop and wait and let go of everything I ever knew and only just look ahead, you better believe I am going to do my best to prepare, and listen to Him, and do exactly what He says to do because I want to land smack-dab on top of a mountain, too.

genesis: chapter 6... smelly garbage

Now it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born to them... (6:1)

Then the Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intent of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually (6:5).

STOP. If you are a Christian that verse is a matter of routine. Yep, they were bad, they deserved to die, go forth, next verse. But if you are an unbeliever, a non-Christian, a pagan- whatever you like to call yourself, this statement could be highly offensive. This statement could be calling YOU evil. All those people were killed in the flood, only God saved Noah and his family, because Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord (6:8). If you lived back then, would you have been in Noah's family, or not in Noah's family?

I remember the process in which I accepted my own depravity. I had heard and rejected countless gospel messages and after one of them I crowed proudly and laughingly to a pastor's sweet daughter, "Totally, I'll admit it, I'm a born sinner!" She gently and naturally replied, "Yes, we all are."  Yikes. Right. Yes, of course. That's the point, isn't it? We all are. It wasn't the monumentally destructive partying, or the cheating, or the deception, or the cruelty. It was all of it, rolled up into everyone else's own truck full of smelly garbage that brought Jesus here. Not for sin, but for love.

This is a daily exercise, but the more I admit my own depravity, the more freedom I have. I am not alone in this. The sisterhood I share with boundless numbers of women across the globe who call themselves Christ-followers depends on the gorgeous fact that we not only share the same Holy Spirit within us, but we have all finally admitted that we have done, are doing, and will continue to do some bad things and we need someone to help us with that. We can stop trying to prove to ourselves and everyone else that we are right and good all the time. We can walk naked again before the Lord, admitting our sin and being washed by His forgiveness.

Because the Lord flooded away all of the filth and violence and evil intent (like He does with His Spirit), we all descend directly from the line of Noah, whose heart wasn't evil continually. I'm glad about that. Imagine if God had left the world the way it was, with the multitude of evil people running around, and then I was born unto and among them. There would be exponentially more violence and cruelty in this world than there is now, and I would be exponentially more horrified than I am now, probably at myself most of all...  for the earth is filled with violence through them (6:13). So for the flood, and His cleansing every day, I am glad.

genesis: chapter 5... that's my dad.

This is the book of the genealogy of Adam... (1:1)

It's the proven line generation by generation from Adam to Noah. Let's keep this one short and easy.

• I learned how to spell geneaology. it has an "a" in it. Who knew?
• Enoch walked with God; and he was not, for God took him (5:24). Common assent is that Enoch flew straight up to Heaven. Lucky duck.
• Methuselah lived longer than anybody else ever: he died at 969 years old. Bible trivia!
• Noah's dad named him that because I guess Noah means "comfort" and his dad said "this one will comfort us concerning our work and the toil of our hands" (5:29).  That's nice. We named our girl Phoebe because in Romans 16:1 there was a Phoebe who was a helper of many (plus Phoebe Caulfield is my favorite character in any book). Elliot Abraham is our son's name. Elliot is the French form of Elijah which means "Jehovah is God", and Abraham is the father of our faith. Names are cool.

 The funny thing is, all these people are listed in this book but they are just names in black and white there. Each one of these people had a long life on a new-ish planet. Did they think they were noteworthy?  I think they're pretty noteworthy even if we don't know anything about them. Their name is in the BIBLE. The ACTUAL BIBLE. So I try not to skim those parts. I mean, it's in there, and they were alive. I should give them their due respect.

genesis: chapter 4... jealous much?!

Now Adam knew his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, and said, "I have acquired a man from the Lord." (4:1)

Cain brings a lame offering to the Lord and gets the smack-down for it. What is his response? He kills his brother. What kind of reaction is that? What did Abel have to do with it? Nothing. But Cain decided that he himself no way couldn't possibly be the problem- it must be his brother. Cain even had the chance to cop to it before God but did he do it? Nope, he just got angrier and angrier. That's how people get when they don't want to admit their crap. They just get angry. Its pretty funny in a super-sad kind of way.

What, did Cain think he was special? That he didn't have to play by the rules? Bad call. Not one of us is special- we're all created exactly and totally equal in the sight of God. So if any one of us fails to heed the rules nothing we try to give to God will be accepted by Him. Not worship, not prayer, not service, nothing except an in the dirt confession. Why don't we just admit what we do? Why is it so hard? Why are we so slow to repent?

The really sad part is that because of his misplaced jealously, Cain lost the best friend he was ever gonna have. I know a little bit about that. Looking around at what she has and what she has and what she has which is none of my ding-dang business instead of  looking straight into the eyes of the Lord and walking my own walk with Him. I might not murder you but I might wish you were dead, or at least that you would move to Indiana.

Wouldn't it be easier just to own up to my own sin and leave you out of it? Let me take my eyes off of everybody else and permanently fix them on the Author and Finisher of my life. May I only wish my sisters the best the Lord has for them, loving them with a supernatural love that comes from a more humble heart than I could ever muster on my own without Him who in His wisdom puts me in my proper place. Every time He does it, I thank Him for it.

genesis: chapter 3... earmuffs!

Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made... (3:1)

... and the kids listened to Him. Because they listened, they saw. Because they saw, they ate. Because they ate, they hid from God.

Mama was right: bad company, baby. Eve didn't even really check out the Tree of Knowledge until the serpent sweetly pointed it out to her, convincing her it was for her benefit. Once she got her eyes on that fruit, she couldn't look away, and knew she could never again be satisfied with the gorgeous variety of edibles readily available to her at all times.

But it wasn't really the fruit she was after.  She wanted the result of the fruit. That she would be like God... she would be like God... she would be like God (3:5). She really blew it, too. Imagine the freedom of not knowing good and evil. Imagine walking totally naked- mind, body, and spirit, with the One True Living God. Imagine not trying to hide your sin from Him... just enjoying Him. Just enjoying Him.

I don't even want to start listening to people who tell me sin is okay for some reason or another. I don't ever want to doubt the loving and freeing commands of God. Who is the voice whispering in my ear? Who am I listening to? Who am I following? Who really loves me? Am I doubting what God says? Am I denying His commands?

Lord, let me look to you alone for guidance. Give me eyes for only what you have given me, which is more than enough, Lord. Give me ears only for your words. Give me a thankful, contented spirit, inspiring the people around me to good deeds and not to sin. In the matchless, holy name of Jesus- amen.

genesis: chapter 2... undiscovered mercy

Thus the heavens and the earth, and all the host of them, were finished... (2:1)

I like how God emphasizes that He finished the job. I'm a great starter, but not so great a finisher...

Adam and Eve are in this amazing place and there's one thing there they can't eat but they do anyway and it makes me so mad. I mean, they had it all and then some. They weren't even ever gonna die and they lived in the absolutely best place in the world going cowboy all over the place and were they satisfied? No. They weren't satisfied. They had to have what they couldn't have.

No surprise there. The apple doesn't fall too far from them. No matter where we are, what we do, who we are with... temptation will exist. I could be an oscar-winning actress living on a ranch outside of austin with peach trees in my backyard and there would still still still be some sin that I wanted to commit, some temptation that lured my eyes away from the goodness of God. When we do act on some vile sin, small or large, it is never to be truly recovered from. Redeemed, maybe. A vehicle for God to show His mercy, but never truly recovered from. Because of their greedy mouths,  Adam and Eve had to move, work, experience pain and disease, and ultimately die. But God showed His goodness in clothing them, still feeding them, and providing a Savior to save them from eternal death. Prior to that, God's mercy had yet to be discovered in their perfect world.

Let my eyes and my heart realize over and over the consequences of deliberate sin are not worth the quick pleasure of them. I need self control and greater faith to call upon the Lord when I feel myself falling into habits I know are un-glorifying to God. I praise God for His mercy but let me not test it, Lord. Let me not unduly rely on your goodness to pardon my blights.

genesis: chapter 1... tidy up!

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth...  (1:1)

...and everything in between.

He is so specific, and so organized and distinctive. In Genesis: Chapter 1 everything He created He separated, categorized, organized, divided, distinguished- creating not vague formless things, but making incredible detailed choices about color and size and place and aroma and taste and whether something can fly or swim or be eaten or belongs to the day or the night. Everything He created has a form, a function, a place in the order of things. He created the grass and seeds and fruit trees very early so they would be ready to consume for humans. He created humans separately and immediately blessed them and told them to have sex (1:28) and eat (1:29). He saw everything He had made and He saw that it was very good (1:31).

I should be more organized. In my home, in my car, in my purse, on my calendar, in my writing, I should be able to take stock of it all, see what is there, and see that it is good. Instead of being afraid of being attacked by flying books in my basement, I should donate everything that doesn't fit on the four bookshelves we have down there. Instead of an avalanche of downy freshness falling upon me every time I open the linen closet, I need to divide and conquer the 37 extra pillowcases I keep on hand just in case. I mean, in my house, everything is in such a jumble I can't SEE anything. God could survey his work because He was lovely about it. He knew where everything went and what it did and how it fit together with everything else. It was good. I want to look around my house and my stuff and say: this is good.

Lord help me stop winging everything into cupboards and junk drawers and closets and baskets. I want to be more organized and specific about what is around me. From the beginning I want to have a place for everything and make my surroundings as lovely as I can. Grace me with your power to not slack in this area.